We will, we will cost you!! posted by Richard Seymour

Don't ask me by what unholy means I found out about this, but it turns out you can spend up to £70 to go see

Ben Elton's penultimate wedgette of musical-style shite

. Now before you start, fuck off. I don't care if it's just a bit of fun, you're spending up to £70 for one person to have your mind rotted by Ben Elton and Andrew Lloyd-Webber, a team as creative as your average cardboard box.

I'd rather spend that much for a night in prison. I'd sooner convert to Catholicism. I'd sooner wake up next to Ariel Sharon. I'd sooner spend the next seven days trussed up and forced, like Malcolm in Clockwork Orange, to watch endless video play of Tony Blair's greatest speeches. I'd sooner trade sentences with George W. Bush, even if the only sentence he could ever handle was the death penalty.

But that's just me. You want to waste your money on this shit? Go nuts.