And There Shall Be Wailing and the Gnashing of Teeth... posted by Richard Seymour

I suppose they thought it was funny, naming The Darkness the best British band of the year , but how funny will it be when the rest of the world sits up, takes notice of our 'best' and realises what a load of shit we are. The Darkness are truly astonishing. They combine the most pompous, ass-sucking moments of Queen with the most masturbatory, dull-witted silliness of Seventies music. They prance and preen on stage as if anyone should be interested and their lead singer seems to think he's reeeeeally reeeeeally funny, when actually he's not. And this is our cream, our prize, our star act? If I could eat enough, I'd vomit a new river for this wretched island so that the whole country would reek of my disgust.

If you like this band, you are a moron. There, I said it. I feel better having said it. Fuck you.